My latest novel on Amazon

It seems liked forever ago, but my plan was to have Live the List finished in November.  I wanted it up for sale on Amazon during the holiday season.  Let’s face it, that’s a great time for some sales!  And this is a book I believe in.  I have to.  It changed my life.

See, I started this project with the kids back when I was a single mom living in the apartment.  (You may remember that S and I were on a break.)  And this concept, this idea of finding new and interesting ways to spend quality time together with the limited time and money we had became a way that we improved our life.

The goal was to make memories, to grow together, to try new things.  The goal was to have a more purpose driven life.  Too often people coast through, the daily struggles take over and they forget to have fun, relax, and treasure the moments.  The goal was happiness by design.

And here’s the thing about happiness…when you start experiencing, you want more.  You start finding reasons to be happy everywhere.  The same thing is true of accomplishing goals.  Once you realize that something is possible…you start to think that maybe, just maybe, anything is possible if you try.  And with more successes, comes more confidence.

So, living the list with my kids changed the course of my life, all our lives.  And before long, after S and I became engaged, he was living the list with us, too.  We pulled together more as a family.  We shared our dreams and hopes.  We made plans that we might not have otherwise.  We had fun.

This is something I want for everyone.  And because of that, I’ve priced this book at 99 cents.  In fact, for now, I’ve repriced all my books to 99 cents.

This book is part memoir, part self-help.  I try to teach a new way of thinking and embracing life.  Give it a try.  You have less than a dollar to lose.  And you have so much happiness to gain.

Oh, and once you’ve tried the book, stop by the book’s website.  I’ve created a Live the List Challenge.  I want people sharing and interacting.  I want people to inspire others to make a change.  That’s what the list is about.  There is a Facebook page I just launched.  See what’s happening there, too.

I’ll be making my new list for 2012 shortly.  And I’ll be sure to share it.  I always said that writing was going to be my career.  Helping others has always been my goal.

Enjoy the book!

The longer I’m in the freelance business, the more I discover how many people truly need my services.  As always, the trick is to find them or to ensure that they find me.  So, for about a month I worked with a company where I could post jobs I was willing to do.  And there was a set rate for that.  They set it.  No wiggle room.

I was stupid busy.  I’m talking, I wrote 40 posts in about two weeks.  Not bad, huh?  Oh, and want to know what I made for all that time and effort?  I’m not shy.  It helps me make my point.  Ready? I earned a whopping $160.

Now, I know I shouldn’t complain.  There are plenty of people who never earn what they are worth.  There are plenty of people who would have been really excited to have $160…after two weeks of wait.  Ah, but at some point, I needed to put my foot down.  I needed to start earning what I was worth.  Sure, the sheer volume of work out there was encouraging, but I was exhausted and no better off financially than before.  What I needed was to find a way to do this same amount of work, but for oh so much more money.

Silly, Nicki.  I had a website just sitting there.  All I had to do was revamp the site.  I could even offer others the opportunity to share their services and set their own prices.  There is something empowering about being able to determine what you’re worth.  I could help others and help myself.

That’s what I’ve done.  With some help.  The same way I do everything.

So, you have to go check it out.  And if you have services to offer, register.  It’s free!  And take a moment to list your services.  Set your price.  Everyone deserves a chance to earn what they are worth.

While Rentable Me will have less expensive offerings, my hope is to have more and more people who are serious about earning a full-time income from home by providing quality service to companies and individuals who wouldn’t know where to turn to get the same work done or wouldn’t be able to afford someone the traditional way…an agency, create a full-time position, that kind of thing.

It will take a bit to get it running the way I would like, but I have a few months before the baby arrives to get everything together.  And I’m so excited about the possibility, not just for me, but for so many others.

So check out the site.  Register.  Hire someone.  Get hired.  Explore the possibilities.

For the rest of you…I’m a sacred vessel once more.  Yup.  I’m pregnant.  I’m with child.  I’m sporting a bump.  I’ve added a new lump.  My belly is large and in charge.  Already.

For those of you who have been reading me a while, you know that S and I lost a baby last year, the day before Thanksgiving.  You know how happy we were about the pregnancy.  You know how devastated we were by the loss.  And you know that it took S a long time to recover.

Well, we discussed that I wasn’t getting any younger over the summer.  And we figured that since we were getting married in the fall, we might just as well give it another go.  A baby would complete our little family.  Things are nice the way they are, but a baby would make it even nicer.

Here’s something you may not know about me.  I can get pregnant like nobody’s business.  And I did.  Again.  So much for diminished fertility as I age.  So much for the challenge of getting pregnant with one ovary.  This would make the third time I’d done that.  Ha!

And we found out I was pregnant a few weeks before the wedding.  We had to tell some people.  I mean, some of the changes were obvious…like my lack of caffeine or my inability to participate in any social drinking rituals.  And, me…who is known for having boundless energy…well, it has bounds.  Lately…teeny tiny bounds.

So, when we went to dinner with Lonnie and Lindsay and I ordered a chocolate milk instead of my usual soda or margarita…there were questions.

Lonnie: What?  Are you pregnant?

me: Yup.

And I sat down.  S arrived at the table to much commotion.  He just looked at me.

me: Sorry, baby.  They outed me already.

When Mom came for the wedding…I pretty much had to tell her.  There was wine and sparkling wine and liquor, but none for me.  And we told S’s immediate family.  It was only obvious.  And fair.

But we kept the circle of those in the know small.  And for good reason.  How many people did I want to have to tell if it all went south…again?  It hurt so much having to share that post on Thanksgiving.  And all I have to do is reread all of it to remember what it was like for us those next few days while we mourned.

Here we are.  And I’m ready to share.  I think it’s just about safe.  I’m starting my second trimester on Friday.  I made it farther than last time.  I avoided the invasive test that we had before it all went so horribly wrong, opting instead for an ultrasound and blood work that were completed Monday.

The doctor said there was no sign of Down’s syndrome…or a penis.  Poor, S.  He looked like the doctor had kicked him in the junk.  It was so funny.

And we talked it over later after he finished begging my belly to grow a penis.  Finally, he sighed.

S: I’ll love you no matter what…even if you do have a vagina.

We talked more the next morning.

me: Babe, your Pawpaw had a daughter then a son.  Your dad had a daughter then a son with your mom.  Your sister and her husband had a daughter then a son.  I had a daughter then a son.

S: I know.  But we almost had a son.

Some things weren’t meant to be.  Some things are.  This one might.  If it’s not too much to ask, please keep us in your thoughts.  We’ll keep you in the loop.

Here’s my big announcement.

I started my own company.  Yeah.  I’ve been saying I was going to do it for quite some time, but finally realized that there was no time like the present.  Blame it on S.  He has this amazing way of forcing me out of my comfort zone and right into following through with what I say I’m going to do.  He’s the reason I have this blog, which probably means that if I were to trace all my opportunities that have come from the blog, I would have to really show my appreciation.

All I’ve come up with so far is sticking to him until one of us dies.  That should be thanks enough, right?  Actually, he’s really good with that.  And as much as he has worried in the past about that level of commitment, he’s finally truly on board.

That bring us to our new big endeavor.  I say ‘our’ because I need his help, his love, his support, and his camera skills.  We have talked this out together.  We have a long term plan in place.  As of right now, we’ll have him fully incorporated into the company by January.  It seems like a long way away, but it isn’t.  Time flies.  And that’s why I can’t waste another minute.

So, while I was researching all the potential businesses, I found one that I truly loved, one that I’m doing already on a small scale, one that I’d love to do full-time as a career: social marketing.  It’s a relatively new and untouched field.  Most companies are just getting started in that area.  And with the way companies spring up left and right, they need someone to get them started.

I’ve been freelancing for a while now.  And I have been working with social marketing for other companies.  So, it wasn’t such a stretch to build this company.  I modeled it after a company that I respected…a trend setting company.  Only, I can’t be his twin, I have to go my own way.  That’s why I’m Rentable Me.

I could use all the support I can get while I get going.  Bookmark the site, where I will officially start promoting companies on May 1st.  If you have a Twitter account, follow the tweets and interact with me.  I love building relationships.  And since the companies I work with will offer daily contests, it will be worth it to stay in the know.  Finally, check out our Facebook page.

My plan is to dedicate the month of May to Mothers, to all women owned businesses and Mompreneurs.  So, if you are one or know one, contact me by email: Nicole@rentableme.com so that we can work together.  I’m really excited about the future of the company and our life.  You won’t want to miss a minute.  Things are about to get very exciting.

As with all aspects of my life, there will be a second part to this announcement, but I refuse to jinx it before it has a chance, so more news to follow.  Of course, if you check out the website, you will probably discover a hint of what’s going on.  So, stalk me already.  And rent me to do your bidding.  You won’t be disappointed.

And I really need to focus on some happy.  So, here it is.

You all know that I write for Yahoo! in lots of different capacities.  Well, every year, Yahoo! honors its writers with awards.  And even though I couldn’t imagine I had written enough to get noticed, I was nominated and won for a piece I wrote about holding a relationship together while mourning the loss of a child.  (Where do I come up with this stuff?)

It’s a huge honor.  And I’m so touched.  I’d love it if you took a moment to read my acceptance speech.  And if you haven’t read the piece I won for, it’s linked inside the speech.

Hopefully, life will slow down and I’ll have a better more original post up tomorrow.  I’m keeping my fingers crossed for a special happiness post.

So, I wrote a post on Shine discussing a family tradition.  If they like it, I could be a Shine Parent Guru.  Though it probably goes without saying, I would love to be a Shine Parent Guru.

Sure, there is the distinct possibility that I may be spreading myself too thin, at some point, but not yet.  I still seem to be able to manage to keep up with my reading for the From Left to Write online book club.  (And I’m loving it!  I love the selections that have been offered.  I love writing about personal experiences related to these books.  Win win!)  And so far, I have done well with keeping up with my Yahoo! Mother Board posts.  Okay, I’m struggling with the topic for this month: healthy eating.  We do our best around here.  Enough said.

I guess that I am simply exposure greedy.  I am working my tail off to get published.  I have many dreams for this life and none of them involve doing what I’m currently doing until the day I die.  So there.  And if it means that I have to stretch myself a little further in order to see some return on my efforts, I’m there!

Do me a favor, please.  Check out my post on our family tradition over on Shine.  Leave a comment and let me know what you think.  I can use all the help I can get.  And I’m not too proud to ask for it.

And if you have a chance, tell me about some of your family traditions right here, too.  I’m always looking to adopt some great family traditions.

Recently, I had the opportunity to sign us up for a new giveaway.  Yes, us!  See, I love my free stuff, but more than that, I love getting free stuff to share.  This time, I have something I know you’ll love!  (Okay, I can’t be certain, but I am reasonably confident…)

Shutterfly is a wonderful site offering you the opportunity create personalized stationary and cards using your photos.  And since I will be getting married some time in the reasonably near future, I thought about all those thank you cards I’ll need.  This should give me a great start.

I knew nothing about Shutterfly, but I love trying new things.  The site is very user friendly.  (Never underestimate the importance of a user friendly site.)  And the options are plentiful.  Very quickly I found a ton of different thank you cards I could personalize.  I love variety!  I love personalized stuff!  I can even see where I could become dangerously in love with Shutterfly.

And so they have given me a promo code for ten free cards for myself.  Oh, but the best part is that three, yes THREE, lucky readers will also get ten free cards.

Think of the possibility!  You could actually send Christmas cards this year!  You could send baby announcements or bridal shower invitations, or save the dates.  You could even personalize your own thank you cards, like I plan to.

All you have to do to enter is leave a comment on this post about anything Shutterfly or personalized card related.  The promotion will end on Tuesday, August 3^rd.  The winners, selected by Random.org, will be announced on Wednesday, August 4^th.

Good luck!  Happy commenting! Share and Enjoy:

While my marriage was no picnic and the divorce was…similar, I still find myself in a better position than many.  There were arguments about who would remain in the house.  Ultimately, we both lost on that one.  There were arguments about who would get some of the various possessions.  Only on one point did we truly agree: no matter what, we wanted the kids to have plenty of time with both of us.  How to handle visitation and custody, for the most part, has not been much of an issue between us.

I know that I’m lucky.  I know this because I talk to parents who are fighting for custody and up to their eyeballs in debt because of exorbitant court costs.  I know because I have spoken to single moms who have exes that simply disappeared after the divorce, exes who rarely keep their scheduled visitation.  My big challenge…child support.  We even managed to work out the entire divorce without lawyers.  The entire process, start to finish, cost me about $15.  In the scheme of things…I’m doing just fine.

My kids spend three weekends a month with their father.  They live with me during the week all school year.  And we tend to be pretty flexible during the summer.  I am…ridiculously fair, overly considerate, a mediator and peacemaker from birth.  I suppose that’s why we stayed married for so long.  And I know that’s why the kids are as well-adjusted as they are.  Yes, I’m lucky.

For those who aren’t so lucky, there are organizations that work to change the laws, work to make sure that parents have the resources to co-parent.  One such organization is Kids Need 2 Parents.  They have a lovely logo designed by one of their members.  And I think their slogan is nothing short of perfect: Because the BEST parent is BOTH parents.

For those of you located in the Carolinas and Charlotte , specifically, there is a rally being held today in center city.  It will be from 3-5pm in Marshall Park.  (More information is available on the website.)  There will be several speakers, some famous even, like Tim McKyer.  Check them out.  Hear them out.  And do what you can to ensure that others who might benefit know about this.

Kids should never suffer because their parents can’t make it work.  And it’s our job as parents to do our best to put our differences aside for the sake of the kids.  (That’s what I have to keep reminding myself.  I don’t pretend it’s always easy.)

So, if your checking out the Taste Of Charlotte, one of my favorite food festivals, swing by and show your support.  And tell Sheila Peltzer, the president of Kids Need 2 Parents, that Nicki sent you.

At least…that’s what HE said when he called me at work Thursday morning.

HIM: Um…Sophie is birthing the kittens.

me: You mean Charlie.

HIM: No. I mean Sophie.  Charlie is giving birth, but Sophie is helping her.

me: I’ll be right home.

And so I told Michael I was taking an early lunch…because it was 11am.  Then I rushed home to bring the camera.  You’ll thank me.  Maybe.  I didn’t take any of the really gross ones.  It’s bad enough that I have them emblazoned on mine…I didn’t want you to have to experience that, too.

So, I get home to see that there are two kittens with Charlie and Sophie on the bed.  Sophie is licking Charlie and the kittens.  It was so sweet.  And while HE had claimed the entire process had been really silent, the minute I walked in to Rachel’s room they both looked at me and began mewing.  I’ll translate for you:

Charlie: Mommy, look what I did!  I’m soooo big.  And not just my belly…

Sophie:  I’m helping.  See?  I’m a big helper.

me: Good girls!

And they both wanted to be pet and loved.

HIM: I don’t get it.  They were quiet before you got here.

What can I say?

And there’s something rather special about them being born on May 6th.  This is the day that Emily was born 17 years ago.  She was my first.  She’s always remembered.  *sigh*

Well, after I told him the significance of the day, we went out on the patio to leave them alone for a few minutes.  It was so neat experiencing the miracle of life together.  (Um…except for the placenta eating part…)

me: We have to tell Rachel.

While he was sending a message with one of the pictures he took with his magical iPhone, I went back in the room.  I was only in there for a moment when I noticed…a third kitten!  So, I called him.  No sense in disturbing the girls by shouting.

HIM: Really?  You’re calling me?

me: There’s a third kitten!  I just walked in…

And he was in the room before I could finish.  This is one of the many things I love about him.  He’s not too cool to be all excited and involved.

Well, we watched for a bit more and planned our day.  We still talk constantly about work, but it’s our future, a big part of our life.  And it’s one of the things that connects us.  We’re getting closer and closer because of this.

Eventually, I had to go back to work.  And I didn’t want to.  Before I even made it back…there were four!  Four kittens!

HE hung around for a while.  He wanted to make sure that there were no more kittens popping out unattended.  After all, they were on the bed and we didn’t want them to fall and die.  Last I heard he was leaving around 1:30pm.

Rachel came home about 2:30pm.  And she called me on the walk from the bus.  And she was so excited and wanted me to describe kittens that she would literally be seeing in seconds.  Seconds.

She hung up the phone.  And then she called back.

Rachel: There’s five!  There’s five!  I counted twice!

me: There’s five?  Are you sure?

Rachel: I counted TWICE.

Guess there’s five kittens.  Yeah.  I need five kittens like I need another hole in the head.

And…on the freaky side…

You know how you hear about these crazy women who so badly want a baby that they fake a pregnancy and steal one?  Well, we’re currently experiencing our version of that in the animal world.  Sophie is all kitten crazy.  She tried to nurse one.  Let me explain how well that worked.  And then there is the constant removal of her from the basket of Charlie and the kittens.  Good times.

So…if you want a kitten…let me know!  We could work it out…

Be ready to read a weekly update on the kittens.  I’m going to call it…Kitten Watch 2010.

I’ve researched the Claddagh, since it is a rich part of HIS Irish heritage.  It stands for love, loyalty, and friendship.  I really like that.  And I love that I am about to have a custom one.

I mentioned before that I had entered a contest for a claddagh ring from a Celtic Jewelry Company in Ireland.  (Yes, they’re in the heart of Dublin, to be precise.  Too cool!)

See, I had contacted them to see if they could make us custom wedding bands, alter one of their designs to incorporate his family crest, but they couldn’t.  Instead, I entered their engagement story contest.  And most of you know that story.  You’ve read the entire story of our relationship.  Well, I posted an abbreviated version of it at o’dark thirty one morning on their Facebook site as my entry.

And…I won!

I have to admit, I’ve been particularly lucky this past year.  I won the laptop from Giyen.  I won an autographed book from Rachel Sarah.  I had the opportunity to get a free lip gloss from Bare Escentuals and give one away to a lucky reader.  And now…this.

See, I’ve been missing all my birthstone jewelry.  It was all given to me by the ex and I hadn’t worn it since the separation.  I missed having a ring on my hands period, let alone the wedding set and the anniversary band I wore on the middle finger of my right hand.  So, that’s where the Claddagh ring is going.

Everything just feels right again.  It’s like everything is simply falling into place.  And I think that’s the way it goes when I’m on the right track.  At least, that’s the way it seems to go.

So, if you want to read the entry…here’s our engagement story.

And if you’ve tuned in late and need to catch up on the entire history of our relationship…I have all that for you, too.  You can read about how we met, and why I believe we’re destined to be, and how we found our way back to each other, how he came to love me, and…ultimately the proposal.  Our story doesn’t end there.  It will never end.

That the engagement story won me a birthstone Claddagh ring from Ireland only solidifies his belief that I should write our story.  He’s convinced if nothing else could get me published…that could.  And he swears it’s the one novel he would ever finish reading.  That might be reason enough for my efforts.  Plus, who doesn’t love to read a story that’s juicier than any fiction I could come up with?