Suddenly *Not So* Single Journey

Unanswered prayers…

Author: thenicknick

This has been such a tumultuous week, full of highs and lows.  And I’m really ready for it to level out, for it to hit cruising speed, for the seat belt sign to go off in the cabin, so that I know I no longer have to fear such a bumpy ride.  See, even as I write, Sam is out with his ex-girlfriend the surgically enhanced sometimes Maxim model for the fourth time in the past week and a half while I stay home and take care of his dog and clean his house, and try to hold it together.

My struggle to find good things to hold on to has truly been put to the test.  I have had some really good things happen.  For one, there was the laptop.  (Never understimate the power of a new toy to put a smile on your face.)  And then there was the call from Gladys at the corporate office, alerting me to the fact that an accounting error had been detected in my favor and she was cutting me a check for $300.  (Everyone knows that found money will put a smile on your face.)  And finally, there have been some amazingly thoughtful responses to my Craigslist ad.  The best part?  My friend, co-worker, and southern mama, Kelly convinced me to contact one of the respondants RIGHT NOW.

So I did.  I’m looking for a home, or at least a place for me and the kids to call home, shoot…feel at home.  I want some stability for all of us.  I want them to not have to give anything else up, since they’ve lost so much already.  Those are the dangers of divorce and breakups; the aftershocks. 

Well, I took Kelly’s advice.  And Rachel’s since we had spoken about it the night before.

me: Listen to this!  This guy has a 4000 square foot house that he is willing to share with us.

Rachel: How big is 4000 square feet?

me: Over twice the size of this one.

Rachel: We wouldn’t even have to see him if we didn’t want to!

And so, I broke down and called.  Now, please understand that I work the phone all day.  If there’s anything I have, it’s mad phone skills.  So you can imagine my surprise when I called and found myself stumbling over my words, the timing of my jokes off, and less than my normal charming confident self.  Grrr.

Still, it didn’t seem to bother him AT ALL.  He was very nice.  He laughed at my jokes anyway.  He wanted me to feel at home there.  Our rooms would be ours.  (It’s a five bedroom house.)  We could walk the place together and pick out what rooms I wanted.  And he even offered to paint before I came.  WOW.  That’s all I can say.  WOW.

Apparently, there is a nice deck out back, just a little 1600 foot addition.  And the third floor is the media room.  And there were other fancy rooms he mentioned.  And my mind was reeling so you’re just going to have to wait for the pictures.  Check back Sunday since I’ll be going to see the place on Saturday. 

Oh oh oh!  I forgot the best part.  It’s completely affordable.  I’ll be trading way up for less money, which is good since I’ve been living hand to mouth for far too long.  He’s not trying to get rich, but let’s face it, I will be jacking up his expenses.

Oh!  And I forgot another best part!  It’s a pool community, one of the pool communities that I once looked at and fell in love with.  There are two pools, one with water slides, and apparently that’s the one he lives across from.  And I say, if I’m going to nurse a broken heart, I might as well do it while sipping ‘ritas poolside. 

And suddenly the words on my cake come hurtling back at me.  I thought that was my worst day ever…the day of the Divorce Party that never was because of I break up I never wanted.  Instead, maybe goodbye is a second chance for me.  All I know for certain is that this guy may very well be an answer to all the prayers that people have been saying for me.  And I thank you for that. 

I’ve spent a lot of time praying that Sam would have a change of heart, that he’d want me to stay, that we’d spend forever together.  Now another song comes to mind.  God bless Garth Brooks.

Unanswered Prayers lyrics

Just the other night at a hometown football game
My wife and I ran into my old high school flame
And as I introduced them the past came back to me
And I couldn’t help but think of the way things used to be

She was the one that I’d wanted for all times
And each night I’d spend prayin’ that God would make her mine
And if he’d only grant me this wish I wished back then
I’d never ask for anything again

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers
Remember when you’re talkin’ to the man upstairs
That just because he doesn’t answer doesn’t mean he don’t care
Some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

She wasn’t quite the angel that I remembered in my dreams
And I could tell that time had changed me
In her eyes too it seemed
We tried to talk about the old days
There wasn’t much we could recall
I guess the Lord knows what he’s doin’ after all

And as she walked away and I looked at my wife
And then and there I thanked the good Lord
For the gifts in my life

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers
Remember when you’re talkin’ to the man upstairs
That just because he may not answer doesn’t mean he don’t care
Some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

Some of God’s greatest gifts are all too often unanswered…
Some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

 

I’m seeing some light at the end of my tunnel.  The storm clouds over head seem to be breaking.  And for the first time in a very long time, I’m giggling.  My mother caught me when I called her with the news.  (And to her credit, she never once insinutated I might be crazy for wanting to live with a man I don’t know.  Of course, given that I’ve now twice lived with men I did know and how that didn’t work so much…) 

So, keep your fingers crossed for me, and throw some salt over your shoulder, and please keep those prayers coming.  Right now, whether they are being answered the way I want them to be or not, my life may just be back on course.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 23rd, 2009 at 12:16 am and is filed under Big News!!!!. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.