Suddenly *Not So* Single Journey

I Sit Amazed

Author: thenicknick

As sad as I was yesterday about the fallout from the Fourth, today I’m happy, hopeful, and as always reflective.  While I am reluctant to divulge much about my relationship with S, due to its intensely personal nature, I know that for many it is a subject of great fascination.

Previous posts would lead you, and not wrongly, to believe that we have had a tumultuous relationship.  Yet here we are, living together.  And no one is more surpised than we are.  We discussed it last night in the hot tub.  We have some of our best discussions at night in the screened porch that houses the hot tub.   It’s one of our favorite rooms. 

There’s something about snuggling in bubbly chlorinated water while looking out at the moon and stars and listening to the station of our choosing that helps us open up even more than normal.  As we sat there, a la the tub scene in Pretty Woman, his head against my chest, my legs wrapped around him, I asked if he saw any of this coming.  The response was a resounding ‘no.’

When we first started dating, he told me that he didn’t want a girlfriend.  I told him that I just wanted to be with him.  No pressure.  Next thing you know, we’re exclusive.  He told me he didn’t want to date anyone older or that had children.  I’m all that and more.  I told him to not judge me based on things I couldn’t change.  Now, he’s living with a woman and her two children…big, nearly grown children.

And he still stands by one last claim: we’re never getting married.  He’s even turned it into a song… and dance.

S: Never gonna do it.  Never gonna do it.  Never gonna do it never gonna do it.  Never gonna do it!  (Think En Vogue.)

It’s very cute.  And it makes me laugh.  And I don’t care one bit.  Marriage isn’t a measure of commitment.  (I learned that the hard way.)  Marriage isn’t a means to security.  ( Same lesson.)  It isn’t even a guarantee of lasting love, or love at all. 

I’ll take the man who comes home to me every night, who stays up late talking to me, who holds me like our bodies were made for each other.  I’ll take the man I can laugh and play with, who loves my singing, my quirky ways, and indulges me with time wandering the beach in search of shells, stones, and sea glass.  I don’t need to call him husband.  I don’t need a piece of paper to keep him or a ring to bind us together.  After all this time, I am still content just being with him.

Our adventure has barely begun.  We have an amazing life ahead of us.

Tags: dating, relationships, romance

This entry was posted on Monday, July 6th, 2009 at 12:07 pm and is filed under relationships. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.